


An attempt to improve an alternative life

by imadeafanpage



Series: Journey's End Fiction [3]
Category: Journey's End - Sherriff
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - Zombies, Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Just Take It Please, M/M, Semi-graphic wound description, Zombie Apocalypse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-14 04:30:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14128095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imadeafanpage/pseuds/imadeafanpage
Summary: A raid gone wrong.





	An attempt to improve an alternative life

"You're okay, Jimmy." He murmurs, caring mode activated by the blood trickling from the other's shirt, on his left hand side. Raleigh swayed on his feet and sat down heavily, shock evident on his face. "You're going to be fine, I'll get you back to the base." Stanhope grips his shirt at the back of his neck and yanks it quickly over his head, wadding it up to place over the wound. He pushes Raleigh to lie back, and kneels by his side. "We're okay..."

He wanted to believe it, but the James Raleigh that he was leaning over wasn't the naive boy of 5 years ago, or even the soldier of 3, but a man forged in the unforgiving heat of the post apocalyptic world. His eyes shone, flinty in the dim light of room, and Stanhope steeled himself for whatever would come out of the younger man's mouth, as he desperately leaned over him to place pressure on the wound.

"Oh cut the crap, Den," Raleigh said, not sharply, but with an perceptive bluntness that seemed at odds with his youthful face. "I think... you forget, I used to read all the dystopian novels." His honest assessment of the situation belies his age, and he winces as Dennis pushes even harder on his ribcage. He sucks in a sharp breath, and continues- "I know how you this goes. I ask you if the mission was a success, you tell me that it was (ideally it would be the truth but a lie would be acceptable in this situation) and that my sacrifice has somehow ended this brutal war, and I... I get to die happy in your arms." His breathing becomes more laboured and the shirt Stanhope has pressed into his side is starting to soak through with blood.

Stanhope speaks, "You are not going to die on me James Raleigh, I swear-"

"This isn't some kind of paranormal romance bullshit Dennis! This is the real world, this right here is our life, and those zombies took a great big fucking chunk out of my side. So unless you somehow plan to amputate the lower half of my body with no surgical equipment, anaesthetic, or protection from the zombies we attracted in earlier's disaster, I am going to die. And then, I am going to rise from the dead, and my animated corpse *will* kill you."

Stanhope's hands are damp now, and blood seeps up between his fingers from the pressure he is applying to the wound. The scene is macabre, but in no way the worst thing that either of them have seen in the 4 years since the apocalypse. The fact that it is someone he cares so deeply for makes the scene bizarre, surreal. Stanhope shook his head, his eyes beginning to sting. "No." He said, "We need you, Jimmy, the men need you, I need you." His voice is breaking. There is no sign of the others, and with the increasing silence he has to admit that rescue seems improbable

"I know." Raleigh says simply and defeatedly. "I know you need me. Doesn't change things though does it." His teeth are gritted and those measured eyes show his pain. "Let's face it, Dennis, we lost 8 of our most experienced men out there- (flatly as Stanhope tries to interrupt) they are all dead- and as good as you are, you can't get the two of us back out and safely to base. All we'll do is lead the beasts to their next meal." Stanhope just shakes his head in denial. Raleigh struggles to lift his right arm, not even attempting to move the left, and with some difficulty drags his torn and bloodied t-shirt up, about a centimetre. The blood suctions the rest of the fabric to his skin, and he is further hampered by Dennis pressing on the wound.

"Listen to me Dennis." Stanhope turns his wild eyes to meet Raleigh's, as a single glimmering tear run down his cheek. "Pull up my shirt," he says in a firm but weakening voice "and look at my wound." The injury itself is a numbing blinding gnawing pain, somehow bearable in its agony unless he moves, but the burning sensation that is travelling across his abdomen is like nothing he has ever felt before. It has to be the venom spreading, which would explain the lethargy taking over. Although perhaps dying was just exhausting. He hadn't been able to talk to the many deceased he knew as they passed away. A bullet in the brain was not a slow conversational death. If only he hadn't lost his gun in the scuffle. He could end it himself and spare Dennis the pain.

Stanhope carefully lifts the soaking t-shirt away, desperately trying not to consider what the heavy weight of the t-shirt means, and peels the clinging fabric away from Raleigh's wound. He nearly vomited. The skin and muscle was gone, several ribs splintered and crushed as though something has literally grabbed on and torn a part away- oh. Luckily the internal organs seemed to be intact in that deep dark maw, but the fact that he could see even a glimpse of them was not a good prognosis. And the streaks, deep black and blistered, unmistakable even in this light. The virus has been transferred, it was not just a venomous bite. Stanhope was transfixed by the injury, horror in his eyes. He shook his head and pressed the soaked t-shirt back over the wound and, whilst the pressure was firm, it was clear he knew that there was absolutely nothing he could do.

"Dennis," said Raleigh urgently. "Listen, you have to have a plan. The zoms are back." His speech is punctuated by a distant sound of footsteps and something heavy being dragged. Stanhope is still shaking his head. "Dennis- listen to me now please- do you have your gun?"

Stanhope reached down to his thigh holster with one hand. Empty. His belt yielded the same result. His heart dropped; he didn't have to answer- Raleigh had watched him search. "Boot knife." Stanhope said pulling it out. "I have my boot knife." He sighs.

"Kiss me, Dennis," Raleigh said looking up into his eyes from his position on the ground. "I know we agreed not to, because of Madge, and then when she died it was all too soon for you-" Stanhope leans over and gently cradles Raleigh's face with the hand that is not pressing on his wound. "You idiot." He says emphatically, but I'm a voice filled with wonder and love. "You absolute idiot. I have been waiting for you to be ready for this for 2 goddamn years- and now here you are, lying in my arms bleeding out, and asking me to kiss you as though I haven't spent the last 700 days wanting to do that very thing." And oh so gently, he slots their lips together. Despite the turmoil of the scuffle, the unkempt facial hair and heavily rationed toothpaste, Raleigh tastes just as he did the last time, 3 years ago when they had decided it would be cruel to Raleigh's sister to continue with their relationship. The kiss is desperate, hopeless, passionate and regretful. Raleigh could not have imagined better.

"Good," Raleigh says when they break apart. He looks Stanhope directly in the eye, swallows, and says "and now I want you to slit my throat."

Stanhope visibly recoils. "Think of it as my dying wish," he persists. "Put me...out of my misery...:" His breathing is becoming wetter. "Leave my body to the Zombs and...and escape over the roofs...They". His breathing is laboured and though the bloodflow seems to be slowing, that is merely the clotting action of the venom and Stanhope's pressure. "They won't have touched... t-the car. You make it out, tell others what happened." He hisses and Stanhope can see the venom is still climbing, nearly at his throat. "I don't have long."

Dennis is openly crying now, silent tears mingle with the blood streaking his hands. "I wanted to save the world Dennis..." Raleigh forces out past a body that just isn't co-operating, "but I'll be happy with saving you." His tears cause Stanhope to let go of the wound, admitting defeat and he pulls Raleigh up to cradle him in his arms. "Carotid artery," Raleigh is muttering, "Interupted not severed, unconciousness in 1 to 3 minutes." Stanhope hugs him to his chest.

"In another life and time, James Raleigh, you wouldn't need to know that." His voice is choked with tears. The Zombs are outside the door, he can hear them now.

"I'd always know you though Dennis. Wouldn't I?" The innocence the two had thought lost was returned to his voice for just a moment. "I'm not scared." He says so quietly that Stanhope has to duck to hear him, "I know you'll be there next time."

The words are like a knife through Stanhope's heart. 

"I love you Dennis." He says.

"I love you too James". Stanhope says.

And in one swift motion he pulls the blade across his lovers throat. It's a clean cut and hot blood courses over the two of them. Raleigh is spluttering in his arms and twitching despite his efforts to make this easy. "Don't worry James, I've got you, I'm not letting go. I know, I know. It won't hurt, your brain will be pumping out endorphins until you fall unconcious. I love you. You are so so brave." The spluttering has stopped, Raleigh's panicked eyes are closing and the blood is still pumping onto Stanhope. "I know you can hear me, and I won't leave until you are gone." Stanhope feels that if Raleigh wasn't dying then he might be kicking his ass for not getting a move on, but in that moment holding his lover was more important than his life. The handbook said 1 to 3 minutes for unconciousness. Raleigh was dead in 90 seconds.

**Author's Note:**

> So that happened...
> 
> I know it's nothing great but it's just a small idea that I had whilst working on the sequel, basically taking Raleigh's death and just hurting myself. My friend and I were talking about how we need more AUs in this fandom, especially because we are so limited for fanworks, so I thought I would try to write something a little bit different to what I would usually go for. I know it doesn't really focus on the Zombies or explain what they were doing or how they got to be where they are today- but I hope it kept you entertained for a few minutes. We need a few poorly written fics to appreciate the good ones so that's my gap to fill (finally something I'm good at).
> 
> I feel like my search history after writing this made me look like a bit of a serial killer, with searches like "what does it feel like to slit someones throat", "how long does it take to bleed out from a severed carotid", "can human teeth break large bones" etc. I may have taken a few liberties but I'm sure it's fiiine. (I am terrified of being wrong.)
> 
> My tense is all messed up so i apologise for that- I will probably come back to fix it- please let me know if you notice any other issues though as I have barely proof-read.
> 
> Anyway! Sorry for going on and thank you for reading!


End file.
